AND THE WINNER IS …… ANXIETY, EVERY TIME

Whenever I check the stats for what people search for when looking for a therapist, Anxiety is always there at the top of the pile. Even before the extraordinary situation created by Covid-19, it was always Number One, so now it has a clear head and shoulders lead over Stress, Trauma, relationship problems and so on. Why?

Well, for one thing it is a general term that embraces various issues. It’s a word that is thrown around lightly, it’s an “alright” thing to have, it’s accepted and (sort of) understood.

The NHS defines anxiety as “a state of unease, such as worry or fear,  that may be mild or severe, ”
It is perfectly normal – and healthy – to feel anxious at certain times. This goes back to the old “fight or flight” syndrome of stone-age man. When coming face-to-face with a hungry lion, the man had to make a choice – stay and fight the beast, or run. The chemical process triggered in the body in the split seconds it took him to make his decision has been clearly identified, and involves the amygdala, at the back of the brain. At the first sign of danger, it releases adrenalin, a chemical that puts certain systems on high alert. It also shuts down systems that are not so important: stone age man would not have been aware of being hungry or wanting to have a pee when faced with a hungry lion. All resources are pumped to the brain, the muscles, the heart and the senses.
Once the crisis is over – when stone-age man has killed the lion or escaped from its clutches, the flow of adrenalin is stopped, and the systems return to normal.
A touch of adrenalin is a good thing – it gives us that “edge” before we make a presentation, or have an interview or take a driving test. But prolonged adrenalin is like driving a car with the choke out all the time (those of you too young to remember cars with chokes, go Google it!). There is too much “juice” getting in to the system, it’s working on overdrive, and that is not healthy.
Too much adrenalin in a system is like too much petrol in an engine – it floods!

There are many factors in our normal everyday life that may cause anxiety – work, financial worries, relationship, kids, moving house, death of a loved one  to name but a few. Add into the mix the shadow of Covid-19 and the many implications of that, and there is a perfect storm. People are either rushed off their feet at work on the frontline, in highly-stressed situations, or are stuck at home unable to work, with time and space to think about all the things that might go wrong.
The news is full of horror stories, numbers of death and people suffering: the levels of fear and panic are stirred up constantly.

In all of my work, I seek to trace back the real, underlying root cause of an issue and resolve it at source. A client’s irrational, ongoing anxiety may be the result of an incident or a trauma in their early childhood – or perhaps even much earlier, in a previous life (that is far more common than you may think). It may stem from a set of circumstances that, to the client at least, cannot be changed, leaving him or her powerless.

In exploring the client’s perspective of the situation and the wider world, i can help the client to uncover the  cause of the anxiety if it is a “this lifetime” root.
This may be done by creating a safe space for the client to “download” all the “stuff” that has been building up inside – all the “what if …?” scenarios, the fears, the insecurities and so on.
Or, perhaps some hypnotherapy and past life regression may be more effective, to explore the unconscious levels of the mind and see what is being held there.

Long-term anxiety can be debilitating and exhausting, and can have a serious impact on someone’s quality of life and well-being.
Uncovering the real underlying root cause and resolving the issue at source allows that person to get on with his or her life.

If you would like to have an initial chat about this, or any other aspect of my work, please do not hesitate to get in touch. An initial chat is totally free and there is no commitment at all. My home number is 01444 459 433 and my mobile is 07597 020 512.
I work from Vinings Natural Health Centre in Haywards Heath, West Sussex and appropriate measures are now in place to meet all the Covid-19 requirements.

 

 

Irrational Fears and Phobias

When I talk about past life regression – which I do, given half a chance – some people’s eyes glaze over, I can almost see their ears closing. Others, fortunately, are much more open to the idea that a wide range of issues in this life may, in fact, have their root cause in a past life.

Irrational fears and phobias are typical examples – and I have had clients come to me with a whole range of phobias! Common ones include fear of flying, heights, water, crowds, dogs and, of course, spiders. Less common but still not unusual are fear of crossing bridges, any form of surgery or needles, having something around the neck and being alone in the dark.

Usually, people find a way of coping with these fears until such time as they interfere with life so much that something has to be done. I worked with a lady last year who had just become a grandmother, and was overjoyed. Unfortunately, her new grandson was on the other side of the world, and she had a severe fear of flying. If she wanted to see her grandson, she would have to overcome that phobia!
The interesting thing about fear of flying is that there are variations on the theme: for some it is take-off and landing, while for others it is not being in control. For this particular client, it was being in an enclosed space and not being able to get out, a sense of being trapped.

The answer was found, as is so often the case, in a past life. In this instance, it was back in the 1600s when the client was a man in India. His life unfolded as a tale of riches to rags to riches as he lost his rich wife (and her dowry), but managed to marry off his eldest daughter to a wealthy merchant. The  man got caught up in an earthquake in Calcutta, and was trapped under the rubble, unable to get out. He was not found, and died there in the rubble.
The negative emotions were released and healed, and the client came back to full consciousness feeling much lighter.

About a month later I received an email from her, to say that she had taken a short flight  “to make sure it worked” and that she had just returned from that all-important first visit to her grandson on the other side of the world: how lovely is that!

This lady had never done any past life work before, but she was open to the idea, and it certainly worked for her! It could work for you too – if you have an irrational fear or phobia that is holding you back from living life to the full, give me a call on 07597 020 512. I’m always happy to chat – it’s totally free, and totally confidential. I work from Vinings Natural Health Centre in Haywards Heath; from The Practice Rooms in Hove; and from a lovely stand-alone treatment room in Ifield (Crawley).
I look forward to hearing from you!

 

 

 

 

Creating new habits, new pathways, with the help of the unconscious

When I work with clients, I put them into a deep state of relaxation, and then I access their unconscious minds. I say to them that it is the part that looks after them, and knows everything about them. Which is true, it is the control centre, if you will, and my task is to trace back the real underlying root cause of an issue and resolve it at source.

Very often, a client comes to me with very set beliefs – “everyone does that, don’t they” or “I’m never going to get better” or “that’s just the way it is”.
Well, actually, no. What we think, becomes our reality, because when we constantly think in a certain way, we are creating a pattern that the unconscious takes as an instruction, and does its best to create whatever it may be. It’s called a neural pathway and, like any pathway, the more you tread it, the more pronounced and ingrained it becomes.
Those of you who drive will understand – when you start driving a car, it seemed impossible to keep your hands on the wheel, then put one hand on the gear stick, have your feet doing different things on the pedals without looking, while keeping your eyes on the road and in the mirror – right?
But eventually it all became totally natural, you didn’t have to think about it.
That’s how habits are formed – it takes around three weeks to re-programme the brain into a new way of doing something (that’s why in the bad old days, cigarette companies would say in their advertisements “give it 21 days”).

The unconscious loves imagery which is why so much of my work with clients who are in that state of relaxation is done through visualisation. I use this technique, for instance, when “fitting” a hypnotic gastric band, or when helping people to give up smoking. I use it when I explore traumas that have impacted on clients in this lifetime. When I am going through the process of what I call “cord cutting” – cutting away negative emotions – I actually use a large pair of scissors. The sound of cutting, combined with the strong suggestion that I am cutting away what is no longer needed, is very powerful for the unconscious.

I use similar visual techniques to help people literally shape a new version of themselves, or to “turn down” the level of nagging pain they may be suffering. Because the unconscious responds to such visual suggestions, it is highly effective.

It is all about creating a new pathway to change the habit, the reality, and sometimes I will do just that. I will set up a roadblock, a fallen tree across the road or a diversion sign so that the client has to take another route – which turns out to be a far better way to go. The unconscious accepts the instruction more readily with the added benefit of the visual aid.

The unconscious really does control our reality – but we have the power to create new pathways, new ways of thinking and, therefore, new ways of being!
If you feel I can help you with the issue that is holding you back, please feel free to get in touch – 07597 020 512. I’m always happy to have a chat, totally free of charge and in total confidence.
I work from Vinings Natural Health Centre in Haywards Heath; The Practice Rooms in Hove and a lovely stand-alone treatment room in  Ifield (Crawley).

ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS

Over all the years I have been working as a therapist, I have come across just about every variation on the theme of “Abusive Relationship”, from children sexually abused by parents and / or other family members to emotional blackmail, verbal abuse and “gaslighting” – where one partner manipulates the other into thinking he / she is going mad.

The two main strands involved in supporting clients who are looking for help in such situations are, first, to get to the real underlying root cause of the issue and, secondly, to encourage the client to re-discover their true self.

Those who have been sexually abused from an early age (and I have known this go on even into adulthood) carry a heavy burden that could typically include shame and embarrassment; anger, rage and hatred; a sense of betrayal, loss of trust and confusion about right and wrong. All of these create a potent cocktail that frequently shows up in the adult as feelings of inadequacy and low self-esteem; inability to cultivate healthy relationships and / or appropriate sexual boundaries; a “self-destruct” button and / or self harming.
Different therapists will approach this scenario in their own ways – just one reason why it is important to find a therapist that you are comfortable with before embarking on this healing process.
My approach is typically guide a client through what I call “soul retrieval” – the client’s unconscious will tell me in which years of this life there have been trauma or events that need to be healed. With the client in a deep state of relaxation, and using powerful visualisation techniques, we go back to each year indicated in turn, not to re-live the trauma but to release the negative emotions. My question is never “what happened?” (which triggers the conscious mind) but rather “how is he / she feeling?” which keeps it in the unconscious emotional level. This can be a hugely emotional process as the client finally lets go of all the emotional baggage that has been stuffed down, hidden away for so long, and healing can take place: amazingly cathartic.
Then we can re-build the client, allowing him or her to re-discover their true self, their true power. This in itself is a process of transformation, and I love to see a lighter, brighter, more confident person emerging from the shadows.

Emotional or mental abuse is equally destructive, and gaslighting can destroy someone without them realising what is happening.
Here I work with the client to unravel the tangled roots of the issue back to source. Sometimes this is not as easy as it may seem and may well be somewhat uncomfortable for the client as outdated, inappropriate beliefs and conditioning are dismantled. Relationships may then be seen in a different light; power games recognised for what they are; and different choices may be made, all in a safe, secure environment that builds confidence, self-power and understanding.

If you know someone who may benefit from resolving such issues, do give them my contact numbers – 01444 459 433 or 07597 020 512. Or they can get in touch using the form on this website: the messages do reach me, and I do respond!

I am based in Haywards Heath, West Sussex, and I work from Vinings Natural Health Centre, also in Haywards Heath. I look forward to hearing from you!

LOST SOMETHING? FROM BITCOIN CODES TO LIBIDO – LET ME HELP YOU FIND IT – IT’S THERE IN YOUR UNCONSCIOUS SOMEWHERE!

We all lose things. Sometimes we need help to find them again, especially if they are a bit more complicated than an umbrella or a pair of gloves.

I help clients find things they have lost by searching in their unconscious.
It’s a matter of tracking back to find the real root cause, and resolving it at source.
That releases the trauma and allows the client to move on, free to enjoy life to the full.

What sort of things have I helped people to find?

Libido, for instance. We found that squashed down and crushed in a past life, and very painful it was too.

Freedom to drive over bridges. That went back to the 1500s and a nasty fall off the castle battlements.

Freedom from a gambling addiction: that was what I call a spirit “passenger” making its influence felt.

There was even a newspaper headline recently saying that Bitcoin investors were turning to hypnosis to try and remember their blockchain codes …. well, if it works for that, it can work for you, too, whatever you’re trying to find!

If you know someone who would benefit from finding something, do give them my numbers:  01444 459 433 or 07597 020 512: I’m always happy to have a chat. Or point them to my website:  www.effective-hypnotherapy.co.uk .

I am based in Haywards Heath, West Sussex, and I work from Vinings Natural Health Centre, also in Haywards heath.