If you can’t go outside – go inside!

What does isolation mean to you? Do you see it as a punishment – or an opportunity? Are you one of those saying, “I’m bored!” or one of those saying, “I’ve never been so busy!”

Normally our days are full – work, family, social life, (anti) social media – distractions abound, so we don’t have time to just sit and “be”.
We are, after all, human BEings and not human DOings – but we seem to have forgotten that along the way!

Those who stuck at home may be starting to feel very uncomfortable with their own company, especially if they are used to being in a large office, or going out with friends.

This is a good opportunity to take time to get to know the real you, the one you perhaps avoided in the past. A bit like looking in the mirror, but looking much more deeply, into your soul, and finding that inner you that would love to shine like a beacon but that is probably a tad dimmed down through neglect.

How do you do that, and what will you find? You can do it in a number of ways, but they all involve being in that lovely state of relaxation that asks your conscious mind to get out of the way and allows your unconscious mind to roam free. For some people it could be a walk in the countryside or on a beach – social distancing rules permitting, of course. For others it may be sitting quietly and comfortably at home, with the mobile phone turned off – yes, really – and with some relaxing music to help the mind to settle.

Let your mind go as quiet and blank as you can. If thoughts float in, well, let them float right on out again, as if they are on clouds scudding across the sky. It will take a bit of practice, but once your mind gets the idea, it will be very happy to slow the pace and calm down.

Just sit and see what comes to you. It might be an emotion – which one? Anger? Frustration? Loneliness? Sit with it. Give it a colour, a shape, see where it comes from, what it wants to say to you. Does that sound silly? Probably, but try it anyway. You will be starting the process of “Peeling the emotional onion” and yes, it may well make you cry, be prepared for that. These are emotions that you have stuffed away for far too long, and that need to be released. Let them go, you don’t need them any more.

You may come up with some aspects of you that are not so nice, the ones you usually keep tucked away from other people. These are what we call “shadows” and we all have them. You can recognise them when you are with other people (remember that?) – if someone does or says something that irritates you, or makes you embarrassed – ask yourself why? Is there something in you that mirrors that?

This peeling of the emotional onion is an ongoing work in progress, it is never done, but with each layer that comes off, you will feel so much lighter. Just like those who are taking time to sort out a physical space and throw away the rubbish, so taking time to sort out your emotional space and getting rid of the stuff you no longer need is even healthier for you!

If you would like to have a chat about this, or any other aspect of your wellbeing at this time, give me a call: it can often help to talk with an experienced someone who does not have an agenda, who listens to what you have to say without judgment and who can perhaps offer a few suggestions if appropriate. I’m on 01444 459 433 or 07597 020 512.